Samantha Ronson convinces Lindsay Lohan

It’s lovely to think that Lindsay Lohan can still be saved. And while I don’t want to be overly pessimistic here, her family history and lack of basic intellect tell me it’s not likely to happen. And frankly Lindsay’s been doing this way too long without the serious consequences most of us would have suffered. Sure, she’s basically unemployable, but she still manages to rent out a $10,000 a month home and do nothing but shop with all of her limitless free time. The average person with Lindsay’s issues would probably struggle just to keep a roof over their head. Whatever consequences Lindsay has suffered, they’re not enough to get her to change her behavior. Which makes me think that nothing is, since all that’s left is jail… and the only thing worse.

According to the Enquirer, Samantha Ronson fears that worse thing – that she’ll come home and find Lindsay dead. But she hasn’t given up on the “actress” yet, and has managed to talk her into going into a counseling program together.

Samantha Ronson, terrified that her deeply depressed, drugged-out lover Lindsay Lohan has entered the final stages of a death spiral a la Anna Nicole Smith and Michael Jackson, phoned LiLo’s family and their closest friends, begged for intervention help to save her life - and finally convinced the fading young actress to enter a no-nonsense counseling program they’ll both attend. Things came to a head after Sam found Lindsay camped out on her doorstep at 5 a.m., and camera mics caught the hysterical star sobbing: “WHERE WERE YOU? Where were you?… I’ve been crying… Where were you?… Where were you?… Where were you? Where were you?” Wailed Sam to pals: “I’m afraid I’m going to come home and find her dead!” Stay tuned.

Is this like couples counseling or something more? Generally you do counseling alone so that you can be totally frank about your issues. Really the only reason I can imagine to go with your sometimes friend/sometimes girlfriend is if it’s a couples type thing. Which might help Lindsay and Sam’s relationship a bit, but Lindsay is the fundamental problem and she needs to work on the bottomless pit of her issues. She can’t do that with someone else there. There’s the chance that maybe she’ll make some sort of breakthrough in a couples setting or connect with the therapist and maybe that’ll inspire her to go on her own too. But adding Samantha into the equation – while it’s better than nothing – is mostly just a distraction. She needs to go all-out before she can improve enough.

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